Today as I sat down for prayer, I started to express my troubles and anxieties in a deeper manner.
The more deeper I prayed the more I saw myself complaining to God, blaming Him and thinking that He forgot to help me in the time I needed Him most, like how the Psalmist whined.
How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me?
How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
and day after day have sorrow in my heart? – Psalms 13:1 – 2
Though He has been talking to me lately through the word and various other signs how my affliction is spiritual in nature i.e. it is helping me mature in my walk of faith, however, sometimes when it is too much for me to take, I end up deducing He forgot about me or maybe that He doesn’t care as much.
Though He reveals His better plans about the future for me by keeping on popping this verse “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” -Jeremiah 29:11, in front of me every now and then, still somehow, I feel reluctant to move forward in the way He wants, as I feel stubborn in going about life in my own terms.
As I exposed myself to His word, He showed me that He indeed was working in the spiritual realm and there are things I don’t see and that which I don’t need to see instead I just need to believe that He is working for the good on my behalf.
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. – Romans 8:28
I need only to trust Him blindly and follow his lead! O what a wonderful Father whose grace I failed to see!
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.– Proverbs 3:5-6
I would like to share the story from the bible that I came across that opened my eyes to the reality of things unseen. In Numbers 22: 21 – 31 , we see how Balaam disobeyed God’s orders and tried to do as he pleased. He took off with his donkey disregarding God’s orders. However the donkey was stopped by the angel with a sword seen only by the donkey but not by Balaam. The donkey stopped and would not move any further. Balaam got angry and even hit his donkey nearly thrice but the donkey wouldn’t budge. Finally God opened Balaam’s eye to reveal the angel who had been blocking Him from moving any further against God’s orders and then He fell face down and confessed that He did not see the angel before (you can read the story directly from the Bible here). The story then goes on to Balaam heeding God’s advice and moving according to God’s plan which indeed was for the greater good.
Many a times in life we face similar situations. Life comes to a standstill or fails to move forward as we plan. We get frustrated and angry. At least, I know I do. Like Balaam hitting the donkey, we may blame someone else or circumstances that are unfavorable or even God himself. We fail to realize that we are being blocked in moving forward, may be because God has other plans for us which surely are the best for us. Like Balaam we may not always have the privilege to see what happens in the spiritual realm but surely God will reveal His plans to us and He expects us to obey Him without doubting.
Walk in obedience to all that the Lord your God has commanded you, so that you may live and prosper – Deuteronomy 5:33
Though His plans may not make sense to us today, we just need to trust and follow His lead for He knows whats best for tomorrow. He is after all our loving Father!
“For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways,” declares the LORD. “For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so My ways are higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts. – Isaiah 55 : 8-9